"Do you understand the words that are a-coming out of my mouth? "

Date:  Spring 2010

Age/Gender: 4 & 5 yr old boys (both with articulation delays; English speaking families)

Locale: Yellow Room (Paras/Teachers: Misti and Rayma)

Alias: "K" and  "C"

It is a fact of life, that little boys LOVE big boys.  Little boys just seem to be magnetically drawn to men; they idolize them.  If ever a male stops into one of our classrooms (or anywhere in the building, in fact) . . . our little boys are just instinctively drawn to his side.  They continue to demonstrate their fascination in their "newest hero" by bringing multiple items of interest to drop in his lap and/or by rattling off dozens of questions . . . leaving scarcely enough time for one question to be answered before the next is asked. 

Misti's husband, Chad, often drops by our school (at about the time our students eat lunch) to leave a meal for her or to to pick up their daughter.  Of course, there are several little boys who are always ecstatic to see him walk through the door.  On one particular day, one of our little guys (4 year old "K") had just finished up his lunch and luckily managed to catch Chad all by himself.  All of the other children and teachers were still seated at the lunch tables.  Little "K" excitedly made his way over to Chad and started rattling off all kinds of unintelligible information to him.  Our little "K" man has a pretty significant articulation delay.  Although Chad didn't truly understand a single syllable "K" was working so hard to communicate, he pretended to understand every utterance; taking conversational turns, replying with head nods, smiles, and by interjecting a short word now and again.  This, of course, thrilled "K" to no end and even furthered his interest in this "new hero."

On the opposite side of the classroom, one of our 5 year olds, "C" (who also has an articulation delay, though not as severe as "K's"), was still sitting at the table next to Miss Misti.  He watched and listened intently as "K" and Chad conversed.  After a minute or two had passed . . . "C" tipped his head a bit sideways (as you see a listening dog do sometimes), leaned his little shoulder sideways into Misti's arm, raised one eye brow, and while keeping both eyes on the conversationalists . . . he asked Miss Misti (his own articulation delay blazingly apparent), "Is he speaking SPANISH?!?!"  

Reminded me of (giggles): 

  RUSH HOUR 2

James Carter: Who died, Lee?
Lee: You!
James Carter: Detective Yu?
Lee: Not Yu, you!
James Carter: Who?
Lee: You!
James Carter: Who?
Lee: Do you understand the words that are a-coming out of my mouth?
James Carter: Don't nobody understand the words that are comin' out of your mouth.

My Apologies and a Quick Program Review

A few words of apology and quick review of our program:

Toward the end of this past school year, I was told several very adorable stories that I had intended to share via this blog.  The last month of school however, always tends to feel like complete chaos for all of those involved within the field of education.  There is much to be done during those last few weeks and it is last minute work that cannot be completed earlier in the year.  Therefore, I must apologize to those who went out of their way to share their humorous experiences with me, as they sadly didn't make their way here (I was swamped with many other details during that time).


As a quick review, our program houses two special education teachers, a number of our paraprofessionals (paras), our SLP and her paras, our secretary, SpEd district coordinator, and several itinerant/related service providers.  We have 5 preschool classrooms on site and also provide SpEd services to eligible students within the Head Start program; a great majority of whom attend Head Start on the west side of our county . . . which we often refer to as "The West Side."  I am ultimately responsible for all students and paras within two of our on-site classrooms, as well as our West Side paras and kiddos.  Our other special education teacher is responsible for the other three on-site classrooms and those paras.


I have much more contact with my own Paras (my "team") and clearly get to know the children on my caseload much better than I do those from our partner team.  It is for this reason that I am better able to more accurately recall some of these fun stories/experiences that took place within my own team's setting, than I might from my other colleagues.  I apologize in advance for any facts I might mix up in regard to either team and for any stories that I've forgotten altogether.


Now . . . I'm off to proceed with the two or three tales I can recall . . . followed in only a few short weeks by our new school year and all of the fun, new experiences which await us  . . . and just how is it that this summer seems to be passing so much more quickly than those previous?!?


 

Now that's one BAD hotel!!!

Date:  May 3, 2010

Age/Gender: 5 Year old girl

Locale: Brown Room (testing)

Alias:  L

Our SLP completed a speech/language evaluation today on a little 5-year-old girl whom we are expecting to test out of Special Education this week (her communication skills are now at age level; happy dance moment).  This little girl had not been in attendance for nearly two weeks prior to today.  As she was beginning the test, the SLP asked L, "Where have you been?  We've missed you!"  L explained that her Grandma in SLC had a heart attack and they were staying in a hotel while she got better.  L proceeded to explain, "AND, we stayed in a BAD hotel!"  The SLP responded, "A bad hotel?  Why was it such a bad hotel?"  With her little face twisted in disgust, L proclaimed, "It didn't have ANY FOOD! . . . . . but, it did have a swimming pool.  I drowned in it!"  "You drowned in it?  Well, did you die?" asked the SLP.  In her typical fashion of thinking that most of us adults are completely crazy, L rolled her little eyes, gave the SLP the "duh" expression and stated, "Noooooo; I didn't die!  I just drowned!!!"  

Trumping Mother Goose

Date: April 19, 2010

Age/Gender: Male; 5 years

Locale:  Yellow Room; Conference room

Alias: B

Our preschool program is very lucky to have Connie Cook, from the Central Family Parent Information Resource Center, housed in our building.  Connie arranged for a few special visitors to travel from the front-range and join us at school today.  One of these visitors was no other than Mother Goose herself!

Our entire morning preschool session gathered together in the conference room to listen to Mother Goose sing and read to us.  In the middle of one of M.G.'s stories . . . our very active/currently bored little "B" leaned over and loudly blew raspberries on his teacher's arm.  He then sat up straight as a board, looked his teacher square in the face and yelled loudly, "Miss RAYMA!!!!  You FARTED!!!" 

Clearly, giggles erupted all around.  Poor Mother Goose had been outdone by the passing of "alleged" wind.  

Dear Dads; They ARE watching you!!!

Date:  Winter 2010

Age/Gender: Male; 3 yrs

Locale:  Orange Room (in the restroom)

Four child-sized urinals all in a row.

Four child-sized bare bums all in a row.

Suddenly, one of the four bare bums begins to shake . . . as does the entire little body.  Rather than shaking the one particular item that he has observed Dad shake . . . our little man held "it" still and shook his entire body.

*giggles* 

Be forewarned . . . your little people may not always get it right . . . but they ARE watching and emulating YOU DADS out there!!!

You Really Deserve Something

I'm going to deviate a bit from my "work" posting to share a stinking cute Facebook Status that my Sister-In-Law posted this week.  

My lil bro' and sis-in-law have five kiddos.  Their second to the youngest, "J," is a four-year-old, "unintentional" little comedian.  He makes me giggle on a regular basis . . . most often when his true intention is presented in an extremely serious manner.

4/5/2010  Exact Quote from my Sis-In-Law's Post-Easter F.B Status:

So my sweet 'J' (age 4) came up to me last night and said, "Mama you really deserve something for doing all this for us today."  I started to speak and he cut me off saying, "I'm not giving you something.  I'm just saying that you deserve something."  So I guess it really is just the thought that counts.  Wouldn't expect a 4 year old boy to part with his candy as a thank you anyway. 

 . . . this came from the same little guy that hours before was complaining to his mother than he didn't want to sit by his two-year-old little sister because, "She likes me tooooooooooo MUCH!!!"

Miss a-Panda

Date:  March 2010

Age/Gender: 5 year old little boy

Locale:  Red Room

Alias:  W

Sometimes our little people come up with some pretty cute pet names for their teachers.  One of my paraeducators informed me the other day that one of our kiddos has been addressing her as "school" when he wants something.  Our Miss Misti is regularly called "Miss T" and even "Miss Tiffi."  Throughout my first two years of teaching, I went by "Miss Melody."  My poor kiddos had one heck of a time pronouncing "Melody."  It regularly came out as something more to the effect of "Mew-o-wee."  So, two years into my teaching career, I became "Miss Mel," which, coming from some of my artic delayed kids, still sounds like "Miss Mouw." 

One of the cutest pet names however, has gone to our Miss Amanda this year.  Since the beginning of the year, our little "W" has addressed her as "Miss a-Panda."  He has been so consistent about it, that at times all of us co-workers refer to her as "Miss Panda" as well.  This pet name quickly grew on our "Panda" and she secretly fell in love with it (oh, yes, you know you did, Miss Panda *teasing/knowing, toothy-grin*).

A week or two ago, the class was getting ready to go outside and "W" addressed our "Miss a-Panda" as "Miss Amanda" as he was asking for her assistance.  She was shocked, dismayed, dumbfounded and even seemed to be slightly hurt that he had pronounced her name correctly!  She exclaimed to him, "W, I'm Miss a-Panda!  What happened to Miss a-Panda!?!?!?"  

W put on his serious, round little lecture face and proceeded to explain to our poor miss Amanda that, "You are getting bigger now.  It is time for you to grow up and be Miss Amanda.  You are not 'Panda' any more.  You have to be Amanda now.  BUT, you can't keep growing or you'll grow up way into the sky and the clouds and then you'd be a giant.  You just need to be Miss Amanda."  W then sped off to play, leaving a very heart-broken Miss Amanda in his wake.

SHOW ME YOUR WRIST

Date: Winter 2010

Age/Gender:  4 1/2 year-old, little boy

Locale: West Side (Brown room---off site location)

Alias: K

In order to qualify for Special Education services, a child's developmental skills (all of those in question) must be assessed using various testing/observation methods.  One of those methods is called "Standardized Testing."  Testing results must indicate that the child either has mild/moderate/significant global delays (three or more areas of development are at least mild/moderately delayed), or a moderate delay in at least two areas, OR a very significant/severe delay in at least one area of development.  The same applies to testing a child out of special education, only in reversal; their developmental skills must fall within average/acceptable range.   

We recently tested a little guy from the west side, out of special education services.  Upon entering our program, he was found to only qualify for speech/language services.  The classification for this particular delay is "Speech/Language Impairment."  As mentioned above, in order to test this little guy out, we had to consider several factors and forms of assessment to determine either ongoing eligibility or that the child was no longer eligible.  On this particular day, the Speech/Language Pathologist (SLP) was conducting a standardized language test with our little man, "K."

The SLP was working through the various test items with K and came to the "body part" section.  She asked him where various parts of his body were and he correctly touched each and every one.  She then asked him where his "wrist" was.  K got a confused, stunned, "you've got to be kidding me" look on his face.  He stared at the SLP for a few seconds and then suddenly flopped, like a wet fish on dry land, out of his chair and onto the floor.  The SLP and parapro's who were in the room looked at one another with shocked fascination.  They couldn't understand what on earth had provoked such behavior.  K then curled into the fetal position, tucked both hands under his cheek, and started SNORING!

The dumbfounded adults couldn't figure out what in the heck had just happened, until they rethought the question that had been asked just prior to the *odd* display of behavior.

"CLEARLY," our little man K had to thoughtfully think through the process of how he might go about showing these "crazy" women his "rest!"

LOLing . . . . !!!

Date: 2009/2010 School Year

Gender/Age: 4-year-old little girl

Locale:  West Side (our school district includes a number of small towns; the west side is about a 25 minute drive to the west from the school I work out of). 

The following is a quick story that was emailed to me from one of my paraprofessionals that provide services for the kiddos on the "West Side."

From Miss T:

One day we had a book of animal pictures and I was asking wh questions about some of the pictures.  I asked her about the one below.  I asked her what it was and she said, "A mouse."  I asked her, "What is he doing?"  This was the wrong question to ask the wrong child.  She said, "Pooping!!!"

F Words

Date: 3/11/2010

Gender/Age: 4 year old little girl; long blond hair; walks around with perma-grin on her face

Locale: Speech Room

Alias:  H

Our school is divided into two "teams."  Each team consists of a Special Education teacher (myself and Miss A are each responsible for a team), the shared speech/language pathologist (SLP), one SLP assistant, and classroom teachers (paraprofessionals [teaching assistants]).  

Our students who qualify for special education services based on articulation delays (as well as those who qualify for this service in additional to their other needs) are pulled from class each day to receive approximately 15 minutes of speech/language services in the speech room.

Under the direction of the SLP, her assistants work on particular phonemes, or "sounds," that each child needs to correctly produce and then generalize into words . . . followed by sentences and finally pronounce correctly during conversational speech. 

On this particular day, the SLP assistant for my team (Miss M [we have lots of teacher names starting with M in our building--lol]) was working on the sound "F" with a handful of students.  They all worked through the lesson with varied success and at the conclusion, Miss M handed out their homework and told them to keep working really hard on their "F Words" at home.

H's eyes grew as big as saucers and her permanent-happy-go-lucky-grin faded into a look of extreme seriousness, and absolute worry, as she said, "Oh . . . . NO!  We aren't supposed to say 'F Words' at our house!!!"

Teachers' House

Date: March 4, 2010

Gender: 4 1/2 year old little boy

Locale: Brown Room

Alias:  A

Many of our kiddos come to us with some pretty significant language delays.  When conversing with our little people, the teachers in our program ask as many open-ended, "wh" questions as we can (who, what, when, where, why, how).  Open ended questions require a thoughtful answer and most often generate more than a one word response; as opposed to closed questions, which typically generate yes/no answers or simple, rote, regurgitated responses.

This past Thursday, the SLP pulled a little guy out of the red room in order to work on his language goals.  They were sitting at the table and she was working on "wh" questions with him, i.e., "What is your name?"  "How did you get to school?"  

For the "where" question, she asked him, "Where do you go to school 'A'?"  His response:  "At the Teachers' House!"

I loved this response.  Fellow teachers will likely appreciate this sentiment more than others, as we all know that our students think we "live" at school.  It is beyond their comprehension that we have families, lives, and homes outside of the school building; hence the confused, "What in the Holy Crap are you doing HERE?" expression we get from our kiddos when we run into one at the grocery store, Wal-Mart, or local fast food joint.

Pokey Fun!

Date:  Fall 2009

Gender: Just-turned-four-years-old little guy

Locale:  Green Room

Alias: N

This story was emailed to me today from one of the teachers in the Green Room!  Thanks girl!  I'm just going to copy and paste (though changing any identifying information):

We were sitting at the tables playing with the playdoh.  We're always supposed to be getting language out of them so I asked the kids at my table what they had for dinner the night before.  N spoke up and began telling me a story about how his mom made him porcupine the night before.  (This was at the beginning of school and I didn't know that he was the son of [an affluent member of the community]).  I'm sitting there thinking, Holy Cow, could he really have eaten porcupine last night? LOL..)   I asked him where she got it from and he says, "The back yard."  I said, "How did she kill it?" and he says "She shot it with her gun."  (I'm thinking Holy Cow, I have Annie Okleys son in my class! LOL) I asked him how she cooked it, and he says, "In a frying pan on the stove."   I said, "Isn't porcupine kind of pokey, didn't it hurt your mouth?" His reply, "Nah, she used a knife to scrape the pokeys off."  I asked him if it was good and he says, "Yup! Sure was!"  
 

This whole story was told with extremely expressive face and hand gestures.

Mel's note:  Some of these kids come up with the WILDEST ideas and stories!  We truly wonder sometimes how they come up with such things.  We get the awesome-est giggles out of working and talking with these little people . . . they never cease to amaze me!

 

Setting "Miss Mel" Straight!

Date:  One cold, snowy winter day . . . 2010

Gender: Barely 5-year-old, round-faced, blue-eyed little boy

Locale:  Red Room

Alias:  W

During the winter season, we get a lot of snow in our small town.  Unlike school districts in the Eastern U.S., schools in our state (especially our county) rarely close for snow storms . . . not even for the big ones. 

In our preschool program, we Special Education teachers act as related service providers and support within the "regular" classrooms.  We are now considered to be the "team leaders" of a group (set of classrooms) rather than individual classroom teachers.  This is all new to us.  Two years ago, we were lead classroom teachers (as was our SLP).  However, as the number of children who qualified for Special Education services increased and needed to be filtered into other classrooms, we found that we were stretched too thin and unable to serve all of the special education children throughout the building.  Thus, we were pulled out of an individual classroom and now serve children within several classrooms.

With this new role, also came new responsibilities.  Two of us Special Education teachers, along with the SLP (and her assistants) are now responsible to help get all of the children off of the buses and send them down the hall to their classrooms.  On one particular day this winter, we got blasted with a big dumping of snow; about 18 inches in a 12 hour time frame.  Several of our preschool buses were late bringing the kids to school that day, and if I remember correctly, one didn't show at all.

After we brought in all of the kids from the buses, I proceeded to one of the classrooms that I work in.  I was surprised to see W sitting at a table across the room . . . as he ALWAYS rides a bus to school and I had not helped him off of his that day.  Standing at the far end of the room from where he was sitting, I stated to another teacher:  "Ahhhhh, W DID make it to school today.  I thought he was absent."  The other teacher informed me that his mother had brought him to school.  I said, "Oh!  I'm guessing he missed the bus---since so many of them were running late in this ugly weather."

Little did I know that the little ears were listening big . . . as we so often have to repeat what we say to him in order to know that he heard and processed what was said.  No sooner had the words left my mouth (normal tone of voice) from all the way across the room, than W piped up and yelled in an offended and animated tone of voice, "I.   D.I.D.   N.O.T.   M.I.S.S.   T.H.E.   B.U.S.!!!!    T.H.E.   B.U.S.   M.I.S.S.E.D.   M.E.E.E.E.E.E.E.E.E (his little thumb pointing in toward his own chest as he informed me of the true, exasperating situation)!!!"

*giggles*

A LITERAL EXPLICATIVE

Date: Spring 2009

Gender: 4 1/2-year-old little guy; he had some behavior concerns that we were just getting on top of.

Locale: Red Room

Alias: M

M is a little guy we had in our program last year.  His behavior was, at times, very difficult to manage (non-compliance with adult requests topping our frustration list).  He always seemed to have his own agenda and as a result, was a very independent little guy.

The classrooms in our school are set up, or divided, into different "areas."  During the "Work Time" piece of our daily routine, the children are able to "work" in the different areas within the classroom.  For example, we have an Art Area, House Area, Big Toys, Small Toys, Block Area, etc., etc.

One afternoon, all of the kids were working away as one of the teachers glanced up from working with a child in the Art Area.  She noticed that M was standing in the House Area, with his back turned toward the large mirror on the wall.  He had pulled his pants and underwear down far enough to expose his little bum cheeks.  M pulled his pants and underwear out far enough from his little rear so that he could see down inside of them.  With a twisted frown on his face, he suddenly yelled, "OH, THAT DAMN DIARRHEA!"  Without saying another word, he let go of his pants and ran as fast as he could (with his pants still hanging between his legs) through the classroom, across the hall, and into the bathroom . . . slamming the stall door behind him so loud that the vibrations echoed back into the classroom.

M took care of his business, washed his hands and returned to the classroom.  A few minutes later, a teacher spied him, once again, standing in front of the mirror, in the same stance, bare bum cheeks turned to the mirror, pants dropped and pulled out far enough for him to glare down into his underwear.  Only one word escaped his mouth this time:  "SHIT!"  I don't know if he realized the explicative was, in fact, a literal translation of his current situation . . . but his point was clearly made to the rest of us.     

At this point, one of the teachers intervened, found M's extra set of spare clothing (we always keep an extra set for each child--in case of circumstances such as this), and sent him into the restroom to take care of "business" again, and to change into fresh clothing as well.

I think one of the more shocking things to hear escape a child's mouth is an explicative.  Why we adults tend to find humor in it is beyond me.  Regardless, it's DANG funny at times.  Our kids are truly like little sponges; they soak up anything and everything from their environments . . . given time and the appropriate circumstances, we often learn that they've soaked up some things we'd rather they hadn't.  LOL!

"D" "D" "D" "Duh . . . "

Date:  February 2010

Gender:  5-year-old little girl

Locale:  Red Room

Alias:  L

Miss J conducts Greeting Time at the beginning of every school session.  The children all sit on the shape rug, listen to a book, learn who has a "job," are informed of any schedule changes, and figure out "who is at school today."

On THIS particular day, Miss J wrote each child's first initial on the board and asked the children whose name began with each of the letters.  On the board, amongst the other letters, were two letter "Ds."  

The following is what took place:

Miss J:  We have TWO kids whose names start with the letter D.  D-D-D-Donald  AND  D-D-D-Daffy (pronouncing the "D" sound several times before saying each name).

L: (who had been sitting so quietly and paying great attention)  Suddenly throws her arm into the air, as high as she can reach, as she says, "Guess what?"

Miss J:  What, L?

L: (the long pigtails on each side of her head swing animatedly) I just D-D-D-DON'T CARE!

Now . . . show me an adult on the planet who wouldn't have unintentionally reinforced that snooty little comment with a fit of giggles.  All three teachers in the room did just that.  Not to mention---we were tickled that L was able to generalize the "D" sound to another situation so appropriately!  *giggles*

Kiss my owie!

Approx Date:  Fall 2009

Gender: 4 year old, strong willed (yet completely lovable), little boy

Locale:  Yellow Room

Alias:  B

During "Work Time (free time)" at school one morning, Miss R was seated at one of the tables, working with one of her students.  B walked up to her and whined/complained that he had an owie.  He then proceeded to turn around with his back to her and suddenly dropped his pants AND underwear in one fell swoop.  He then pointed to a spot on his "cheek" and in all seriousness (whining tone of voice) told her, "Kiss it!"  In a mild panic, Miss R quickly said, "OH No!  B!  Pull your pants back up!"  B, being the insistent, persistent child he is, again insisted, "KISS IT MISS R!"  She quickly explained that it was not OK to have his pants down in front of other people, that she was sorry he had an owie, but that he needed to hurry and pull his pants back up!

Brown Eyed Princess

Approx Date:  November 2009

Gender: Beautiful little "new" three-year-old girl with long brown hair and big brown eyes

Locale: Brown Room

One afternoon our speech/language pathologist (SLP) was conducting language testing on this gorgeous little girl who would soon be old enough to transfer to our program, should she qualify.  The SLP, mother and little girl were sitting around the small, child-sized, rectangle table in our brown room (the brown room houses the SLP and two of us SpEd Teachers).  Most of the furniture in our school is "child-sized," which means that we adults are typically not at our most comfortable state while sitting around the tables and in the teeny-tiny, "one-cheek-sized" little-people chairs. 

Testing around the miniature table seemed to be going fairly well, though the SLP had to work a bit harder than usual to keep refocusing our Little Miss on the testing questions at hand.  This little gal was clearly quite the little princess in her world . . . you know the type . . . the adorable little girl that smiles and flutters her lashes and the world completely stops spinning, as all in it agree to adhere to her every desire . . . simply because they are SOOOO dang cute!!!

About half way through testing, our little princess just suddenly stopped in the middle of a test item, turned to look into her mother's face, and without saying a word, bent over, stuck her nose in-between her mother's legs and sniffed very deeply for several seconds.  Of course, we were all dumbfounded and shocked.  What do you say in a situation like that?  Then, just as suddenly as she had bent over to sniff, our little gal suddenly sat back up, looked her mother square in the face and said,  "You Poopy?"

After another second or two of silence, no one could contain the laughter any longer.  We ALL (even "Mom," in all of her red-faced humiliation) burst out laughing and it was a good five minutes before testing could be resumed.  

Needless to say, the giggles continued all afternoon.